|Why don't you smile?
||[Nov. 19th, 2008|02:35 pm]
For those wondering why I am in such a FOUL mood, let me enlighten you. If you are thinking about asking me to "Smile" before next Wednesday let me warn you that there is a high risk of biting if you do.
1. The pain specialist POKED me in the nerve and spine where it hurt most repeatedly yesterday before he decided I'll be undergoing a Transforaminal Spine Injection under contrast dye on Wednesday for L4, possibly L5 right side next Wednesday. Long needles near spine=Possible better treatment options.
1.1 If for some reason that isn't effective or doesn't tell the whole story or last long enough, we will have me do another MRI (Ding-Please cue my bank to build up another $800 out of pocket before Christmas please). 2. Due to being an ineffective and basically crappy drug, I'm off of Cymbalta. While I've stopped throwing up multiple times daily, I still have to run to the bathroom constantly and my face breaks out in HUGE sweats that soak the waistband of my jeans (thanks for that). I am unsure if this is still the Cymbalta, or if it is the increased pain, but either way I'm flat out SICK to death of it.
1.2 If the MRI tells us nothing, we THEN and only then talk about better pain control. This means that best case scenario I'll be in BAD pain until Wednesday at the soonest. Worst case scenario means for the forseeable future well into 2009.
3. Due to my co-pays for prescriptions now being FREAKING $40!! I sent my birth control pills, you know the ones I take to prevent a flare up of the stage 3 Endometriosis in remission, on a "rush" to the wonderful prescription Mail In Service. Like every GDMFINGS STUPID company my compnay contracts they are run entirely by robot baboon and people who speak no English and regularly file all of my paperwork straight into the "reject" pile so I can be on the phone with them for 4 HOURS. IT'S BEEN 3 FREAKING WEEKS!! I'm going to have an unintended baby before I can get my prescription out of limbo and it will be an endometriosis covered alien baby of RAGE. I HATE YOU ALL INSURANCE COMPANIES! YOU COME FROM THE BOWELS OF HELL (and you smell like it too).
Now. Give me my drugs. Give them to me. Deny me estrogren more and see what it gets you? Huh? I hobbled to the health fair on one surgerized boot to protest this year and I'll do it again. God help me I hope Obama puts you out of business you companies SO inefficient you make going to the DOL a DELIGHT. At least I leave with a license at the end.
After an hour on the phone, my crotch doctor, also called an OBGYN practicing his love of women all over the country by our current President, there will be some Birth Control for me Tonight! Perhaps this hormonal rage has an end in sight? I pray to thee, blessed Advil Liquigel that relief will come soon and a poisonous asp will not be needed in your stead.
4. Have I mentioned that they took away most of my drugs and tortured me? I'm about to lose it. If you are still here by next Wednesday you'll surely be a tried and loyal readership.
5. Our house is cursed.
5.1 The roof is leaking. We don't know why.
5.2 When Craig looked in the attic to find out why we found 3 bees or hornets nests, none of them buzzing.
5.3 All of the lights seem to have burned out at once and the ladder I got us that cost over $100 is NOT high enough to change them. Craig talks of changing them, but still, no light. Whatever, I'm about the burn the f*cking place down in a rage anyhow.
5.4 Did I mention that we already spent $600 on a new water heater and $300 to fix the freezer?
6. Bah Humbug! Don't want the holidays to come. No one can afford it and I don't need more work to do.
7. I'm still in the boot and every day the pin is in the "fused" toe is more of a straight out alien than the other toes. I'm afraid I'm being fused into a freak! Next week the pin comes out, but no heels for 4 months. Yes. That will be ME in the clown shoed wide round "protective" toed flats with a party dress and fancy earrings at the Christmas party!
8. I'm MAD, ok? Someone needs to put me down. If you know of any way to send Ninja, Tranquilizer Dart or other SWAT team helping me to endure with more tolerance and patience, now is the time.
9. I'm bored. I've had to wear the same messed up footwear since October 29th. I'm a fashionista with a reputation to protect wearing a surgical boot and a slipper every day. I have 2 outfits and frankly at this point I was just PROUD that I'd showered AND cleaned both the slipper and boot this morning and had on mascara. Small goals, people, small goals.
10. I have no idea how I've managed to keep my job the 2nd half of this year, but to end my rant I'd like to say it is very hard to appear cool in a meeting when you have sweat dripping through your eyebrows. Post-menopausal women, I salute you.