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Surgery Part Dull [Jul. 3rd, 2008|10:10 pm]
Jungle Booty-Get Down Stay Day
I've been ordered due to "operation save a crotch" that I'm not to leave home. In addition, I'm allowed up only for the purpose of peeing, and if they could outsource that to an assistant I wouldn't be up at all! When I do stand up I get to stroll to premises for a full 10 minutes of excitement. In fact, in a bizarre scenario tomorrow Craig is to watch me shower making sure I don't pass out at the site of my new Franenbody I guess, or it could be a blood pressure thing. He is then to get out a blow dryer and blow me. I kid you not. You can't make instructions like this up. They asked, "Do you have any questions?" I was tempted to ask, "Now, after we sacrifice the chickens, do we unplug the hairblow dryer before or after we begin on the goats?

Pie. mmmmm pie.
To woo me into eating, my mother left the most scrumptious rhubarb pie known to man. Get here early if you want any prayer of getting some of it. Even the cats are eyeing it with wanton desire. I've been told not to buy any clothes since the cute stuff gonzy sent me are already too big now. :( I'm shrinking as the swelling goes down, despite pie. Who knows where it will even out.

Send no clothes, She be shrinking
My Mom told me she isn't buying me any freaking flowers because my cat's a nimrod who eats plants and that it would be her honor to buy me a pair if jeans that fits once I'm freed to go shopping! Yay jeans. Even the size 8's are big now. Need wee pants that crack me up. My own clothes look like they belong to children at this point. I think I could get used to being size 10, but stuff smaller than that makes me look around my house and wonder where is my small asian exchange student hiding, and did I forget to feed them dinner?

Also, here's a quick surgeon review.
1. Actual results-11 out of 10. This guys is freaking talent on wheels. I've seen before/after picks of about 800 post WLS patients with the lower body lift and mine is in the top 2% in my opinion for how good it looks.
2. Bedside manner-8 out of 10. Too serious for my liking, but at least kind and never a jerk.
3. Nursing staff-9 out of 10. Overbooked, but well qualified.
4. Receptionist-AWESOME, friendly, on point.
5. Office-A little fancy for my blood, but I understand why.
6. Finances-More expensive than I expected and more than the competition
, but worth every penny for the result. I think the fee for using a credit card is stupid and this lowered my impression of the office. I understand a small fee, but why a percentage? Maybe if the website explained it it would have helped me understand.
7. Medication-2 out of 10. This was a HUGE area of concern for me for so many reasons. I feel that the pain control the first 3 days was inadequate for the procedure I had and I regret not having stayed in an inpatient place. The first few days of my surgery were more painful than even when I had viral menningitis and was on the morphine drip due to it. I feel like they should have thrown the strongest stuff they had at the pain for the first 2 days and that the combination was not effective enough for the level of pain I was in. I've the Doctor and the Nurses about 87 times about my tolerance to pain meds, how many I need, and still they are Ebeneezer Scrooge sometimes. I know that they want to give me the lowest effective dose and I know that the intentions are great, but they also did a pretty major operation on me. I mean, yes, they DO prescribe normal stuff, but I expect them to take care of this so I can heal until my surgery is all done healing as comfortably as is reasonably and safely possible. Instead I get a 3 day supply and pay co-pays and stress about running out. It's pointless. I don't know if it's the US gov. or them, but I give them a "needs improvement" in this area. For example, I told them I had NO vicoden left on a Thursday appointment at 1pm. They suggested 30 to tide me over until Monday at 1pm. Ummm. I woke up TWICE during the night and had to take more to get back to sleep and in order to be at all comfortable I must take 2 of them. Let's do the math here. That's 6 pills for Thursday. Considering I wake up every time they run out and we have a need of 12 pills for each 24 hour period because they DO NOT ever last 6 hours. I've had a bypass ok? It ain't lasting any 6 hours, we're lucky if we get 4 hours of out it. So, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday all day means 36 pills. Well then, what about Monday until I can get it filled at noon? Let's add n 6 pills there. Grand total of 48 pills with NO extra buffer ever. Thus, this is what I ask for. What do they call in? 40 pills. WTF? Are those 8 pills somehow going to make the world come to an end? Am I supposed to just dose myself with some valium I have left over and hope it makes me pass out so I don't know I'm in pain? Do you prefer me chewing up the inside of my cheeks and waking up in tears with no pills to keep an even number? I won't even get started more on this rant, but I'm sending this to the doctor's office and ALSO a thank you card because they deserve both. Both are valid feedback. I'm not asking for one dang thing I don't need. I didn't ask for more Percocet because I'm making it ok on the lighter meds right now. I'm not asking because it's fun. I'm asking because I need it to sleep, heal, and not be in tears from the pain, that's all. Besides that, I have a LOG of every time I took what pill at my house. I'll bring that and the left over pills to every appointment if they just will trust me and not nickle and dime me until I'm healed up. It won't be too long until I'm healed from this surgery and ok, but until then I don't need to added stress of being afraid of running out of pills all the time. Yes, I know this whole thing sounds like a whiny baby pee pants rant but I am so freaking tired of this problem in the whole US health care system. Educate yourself. All doctors who read medical studies beyond the early 90's and who believe in real science rather than the news media and the stupid "War on Drugs" could do something useful rather than getting in the way of those of us who need and deserve adequate and appropriate pain control from getting it.

If you want to know some of the top ways to to piss me off, here's a start.
1. Insinuate that I'm stupid because of how I look and that anyone who's ever had an emotion is irrational.
2. Tell me that it must be "fun" to take the pills I have to take. You Fing kidding me? I will kill you.
3. Tell me I'm "looking great" when I'm grimacing or crying from pain.
4. Tell me I'm "moody" or "don't seem happy". Let me set your leg on fire and see how happy and unmoody you seem.
5. "Well, you don't look sick. It can't be that bad. Suck it up."
6. You should see a therapist. (Umm I do thanks. In fact, was evaluated by 2 of them who wrote letters to my primary physician stating that my pain was not adequately controlled and I had NONE of the signs of hypocondria).
7. Stop being so selfish. It's all in your head. Just have a baby and you won't have so much time to worry about your own silly problems.

[User Picture]From: gfrancie
2008-07-04 02:47 pm (UTC)
I have to say, this journey you have been on has been incredibly educational. Obviously it isn't a walk in the park for you, but it is genuinely fascinating and eye-opening.
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[User Picture]From: dove
2008-07-04 03:02 pm (UTC)
I can't wait to see you. I'm bringing polish and beads. *hugs*

(LOL! I accidentally typed *ugs* and thought, "That might be more appropriate for right now!")
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[User Picture]From: anomalous_girl
2008-07-04 03:04 pm (UTC)
Anyone who says the above things to you is a really crappy person honestly and doesn't deserve to have you in their life. I have not known you long at all and I know you well enough to know tha tyou are in genuine pain and that you are not just exxaggerating it.

I am sorry the doctor is being so stingy. I used to have doctors like that too who would think I was addicted to Vicodin because I wanted them for my cramps. Ok, i think taking like 6 a month does not make me an addict, but whatever. It is ridiculous how selfish they can be. But on the other hand, everyone thinks Canada is so much better and they aren't. Can't win either way, I guess.
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[User Picture]From: dkstwin
2008-07-04 03:18 pm (UTC)
Ok, it's a different situation a little bit. I seem to be popular on campus with the kids 18 to 24 on the campus. It can't be just that I'm a momma substitute, one girl LIVES with her momma. Anywho, 19 year old asks me if I take pills. I say no, and instead of giving her the long story about my now dead due to drugs oldest brother and his three trips to prison for drugs, I just showed her my daily WLS and Depression regimen. I did explain that when I fell down the stairs and sprained and or pulled everything that I could in my right arm from my wrist to my rotater cuff in September last year, I used the Lortab left over from my gall bladder removal in March of that year. She couldn't believe that I had narcotics left from March.
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[User Picture]From: nolavampiregal
2008-07-04 05:08 pm (UTC)
Thank you for adding me as a friend. I hope you don't mind if I keep myself as one/comment in your journal. (if it bothers you and you don't, just let me know.)

I am horrified to hear about the pain issues you brought up in this entry. I am a nurse and pain control of patients is a huge thing with Joint Commission (the organization that gives hospitals their accreditation)and we are told about it almost on a weekly basis. We are taught in nursing that you are supposed to treat pain according to what the patient wants. I think its a great idea to send them the feedback about this issue. After seeing all that you had done I would expect that you would be in some huge pain. It doesn't look like a walk in the park.

I think that you are dealing with this the way you are supposed to considering all of the things you have gone through with this surgery. You deserve a huge standing ovation for being brave enough to go through it and share it with others.

I really hope that others haven't told you #1-7. Thats crazy if they have!!
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[User Picture]From: ironman1231
2008-07-05 12:51 pm (UTC)
I'm sure they charge a precentage on the credit card because that's what they're getting charged by the bank.
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[User Picture]From: omcintyre
2008-07-05 06:11 pm (UTC)
Having worked in the credit card processing industry for years I will tell you two things:

1) They are most likely charging you the percentage rate they are being charged for accepting your card or an percentage close to that amount.

2) It's illegal for any business to charge a higher rate to people paying with credit cards. They can give cash paying patients a "discount" but they aren't allowed to charge you extra for paying with credit. They made the choice to accept credit cards and that is part of the terms. They can lose their ability to accept credit cards if this is reported to your credit card company or the processing company. If you want to get your money back for the fee, I'd call them on Monday and "explain the situation" ;) Let me know if you need help with this.

Honestly if they are charging more than the average provider, PLUS a percentage fee they are making money hand over fist. They can afford to eat the percentage rate. I used to have most of the big plastic surgeons here in Los Angeles as clients (yes, even the guys on TV) and they were pulling in several million a month in credit card payments alone.

And I think it sucks that you weren't kept inpatient and given better drugs. That just pisses me off. I'm so sorry.
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[User Picture]From: crazyredhead888
2008-07-06 10:45 am (UTC)
You don't look sick is one of my favorites. It's like "thank you for insulting my high pain tolerance and ability not to scream while I'm in agonizing pain. If I cried and rolled around in agony would I look sick enough for you? Maybe if I punch you in the face I will look sick through your blurred vision."
Hahaha...I have no tolerance for people anymore..I blame hormones.
*hugs* I'm glad to see you have people taking good care of you.
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-07 09:59 pm (UTC)
#5...have you been talking to Rich? hehehe

Remember that people who tell you that "you look great" are giving you a compliment, and maybe trying to cheer you up. I know it's hard to think that way when you're in pain instead of just thinking "can't they see I hurt and right now I don't give a GDF about my looks?" but most people are trying to do what they can to make you feel better. Unfortunately, lots of us can be toads.
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