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How to communicate with Lanette [Dec. 22nd, 2007|10:14 am]
1. Email or blogs.
2. Text Message on my Phone.
3. IM me.
4. Meet me in person.

Notice what is missing here? Voice conversations on the phone. I hate the phone. Really. I use it only as a last resort. If you call me, I'm all about making plans and closing up the call. I feel trapped when on the phone.

A few exceptions go to long time close friends and family members. I will tolerate phone calls, especially if you really need to talk, but it takes MUCH time and effort to get this from me, and I only do it because I think it is important as a close friend and sister. I'd WAY rather talk in person. So, to summarize, My Mom, Amy, my sister, Bel, and a very few other people have the ability to call me and get me to talk over the phone. Otherwise, if you call me, I'll try my best to move the conversation to a format that works better for me. It sounds crappy, but I do it for good reason. I can communicate better when it isn't over the phone.

Why is this? It's really hard for me to focus and for my mind not to wander when I'm on the phone. I'll start doing a million things. Even mute the phone and type. I'll be walking around doing dishes. You name the thing and I'll start to do it.

I post this to say if I don't talk to you on the phone it isn't personal. This is standard for me. It just isn't a good form of communication for me.

If it's an absolute deal breaker to have a friend who doesn't chat on the phone and who most likely won't call you if there is any other option, then I would be a bad friend for you. I'm just saying, I MIGHT call you to make quick arrangements and will in fact be relieved to leave a message if you don't answer so I can state my business and finish up quickly. However, if you send me totally pointless text messages and photos I'll be vastly amused.

[User Picture]From: graphxgrrl
2007-12-22 06:16 pm (UTC)
Yes. I can never get people to understand how much I loathe talking on the phone.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 06:18 pm (UTC)
It makes me bummed out when people think it's personal, but really, I just hate the phone. I think it was those years of tech support. I'm so over the voice only conversation.
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[User Picture]From: anomalous_girl
2007-12-22 06:21 pm (UTC)
Hahahaha, you are funny.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 06:24 pm (UTC)
Seriously, I never get excited when I get phone calls. I love getting emails, IMs, and snail mail. I love having time to get together with friends. My phone rings and I just feel totally interrupted.
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[User Picture]From: prairieflower
2007-12-22 06:26 pm (UTC)
I'm the same way.

But hey, now I know why our phone conversations were so short when I was meeting you to walk around Greenlake! ;)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 07:11 pm (UTC)
I can imagine now with Luke that it's even more so. :)
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[User Picture]From: anunnakigirl
2007-12-22 06:37 pm (UTC)
And here I thought I was the only one!
I hate talking on the phone.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 07:12 pm (UTC)
I hate it because for me it's both boring AND distracting. I much prefer to give someone all of my attention, and that's hard for me on the phone because in order to do that I have to just SIT there and try really hard. I'd much rather try in person where it's easy for me.
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[User Picture]From: satwood
2007-12-22 06:42 pm (UTC)
I thought cell phones were only there for texting?
I LOATHE talking on the phone.
I am putting my mom on my cell plan so I can text her instead of calling her.
My dad is the only one I actually talk to on the phone.

probably because it's only for like 2 minutes at a time..
I think for me it goes:
-call or in person.. since 99% of the people I know live 3k+ miles away.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 07:13 pm (UTC)
I get so much more out of seeing someone in person once every 3 months than I do from calling them every week. I DO feel closer if I get to email with them though. It's a weird thing.
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[User Picture]From: xantha
2007-12-22 06:47 pm (UTC)
I hate the phone, too. but I'll do all the others no problem. :)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 07:13 pm (UTC)
I think that is something that is changing a great deal with this generation. My old family members just dont' understand, but even my Mom is emailing me more. I love it!
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[User Picture]From: tattooedgirl
2007-12-22 07:04 pm (UTC)
wow. i thought i was the only female that hated the phone. and i can't get people to understand that i don't like talking on the phone, at all. i even refuse to at the office. i hate it. everyone thinks i don't like talking to THEM, but it's not true. and i rarely answer the phone. if i do, i know i'll be on it for hours. and i just don't have the time either.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-22 07:15 pm (UTC)
I rarely answer mine, but there are a few people I'll dive to get the phone for, especially if I know they might be in trouble. I always want to be there for my best friend and my sister when she needs it. They are ALWAYS there for me, so I consider it an honor if they rely on me in those times.

I commute 3 hours a day, and work more than full time, so it's very hard for me to get in the food I'm supposed to eat during the week and make phone calls. Where I can do email anytime I have a spare moment and I can text when I'm stuck at a traffic light.
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[User Picture]From: cerridwenskye
2007-12-22 07:42 pm (UTC)
I feel exactly the same way and I too thought I was the only female who hated to talk on the phone. I'm kind of shy and talking on the phone feels really awkward for me. The only person I will talk to for longer than a minute or two is my boyfriend Rob. I'd much rather talk in person or on im with other people.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-23 04:31 pm (UTC)
I'm not really shy, but I rely on body language a great deal when I talk to people. Also, in written form, I KNOW I don't have anything but the words, so I assume less and am more clear. I also can wait until I'm in a moment where I can focus on that person (So I'm not driving, I'm not trying to eat, I'm not in a store, and I'm not in a really bad pain spike).

On the phone I have this vocal tone with no expressions and no written words (so if I'm confused I have to struggle along without hints and can't go back). I feel like if I lose focus for a second I'm behind in listening. Also, my hearing isn't the best. All of those things combined make me feel like talking on the phone is hard work and no fun.

As you can tell, the most important part of my cell package is the unlimited texting ;)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-23 04:32 pm (UTC)
It is really hard to talk without body language and expressions. I think that is why I so enjoy talking in person.
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[User Picture]From: pollyhyper
2007-12-24 01:26 am (UTC)
Agreed to the gazillionth power.
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[User Picture]From: meowlet
2007-12-24 04:38 pm (UTC)
Good to know, especially with the amended list in the next post. :)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-12-24 04:54 pm (UTC)
I love communicating with friends, but I really do suck with the phone.
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[User Picture]From: thought1
2007-12-26 08:07 pm (UTC)
I feel the same way about phone calls, but also about email. It annoys me because it's one more thing to check. IM and Text Messages are my preference, if I'm not meeting with someone in person.
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2007-12-27 02:18 am (UTC)
"You name the thing and I'll start to do it."
Mutilating kittens?
Listening to country?

I would text more but it cost me every time I send or receive a text. :(
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