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Lanette

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Important Followup on Romance [Jul. 9th, 2008|12:39 am]
Lanette
I am currently emotionally unstable which is expected. I have been trapped in my house for 14 days and I am still expected to have 4 more weeks of "basic recovery". I feel trapped in my own body. I hurt on a daily basis. I have lost from my life 2 entire months of this year.

These facts do not have anything to do with Craig.

These are things I am working on. There is hope and I'm fighting with all that I've got WITH support.

Romance is very difficult given this situation. Some of your comments were helpful, some of them I thought were true but too judgemental and harsh without considering the context of the situation. Not all of us are lucky enough to have stable health and that presents a unique challenge.

Also, until I am healed I'm done watching movies like PS I Love You and the Notebook. If there are other movies that will make me want to slash my wrists please tell me now. In other fears, I've been too ill to finish my paper and could be kicked out of the conference I worked so hard to get into. I will try to finish it tomorrow complete with a letter explaining the situation.

p.s. So tired, but can't sleep in recliner and when I lay down in bed stomach muscles hurt too bad to sleep. Why can't they knock me out for a few more weeks?
I can now laugh without terrible pain! Please suggest uplifting lighthearted comedy?
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Comments:
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[User Picture]From: carryaway
2008-07-09 01:35 pm (UTC)
I think Little Miss Sunshine would be a good one for her too, because the marriage in it is crap, so none of that romance movie stuff.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 03:17 pm (UTC)
The marriage in American Beauty is crap too and Craig owns that. We should watch it. It's a pretty movie. :)
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 06:20 pm (UTC)
I LOVE that movie. Maybe we can watch it next time I come over? Also, I'll go through my movies and see what I have that you might like to see:)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 03:16 pm (UTC)
I LOVED that movie. I will get it again on netflix. :) It's been awhile.

Craig is still ill but because of his new job doesn't have his insurance card. They think he has kidney stones and he sure is acting like it. He has given emergency emails to HR so I HOPE he gets in today. It's so expensive that going without insurance card just isn't an opting since right after my LBL and unexpected $7000 hospital bill on top of the $18k.
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[User Picture]From: qryb
2008-07-09 11:59 am (UTC)
you seem to be in a better place mentally and i am way happy for you!
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 03:19 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I woke up feeling better. After they told me to take my pills rather than hoard them, it helped. I was too afraid they were going to withhold all help and my severe rationing had me hurting so bad I popped stitches trying to protect my belly.

This surgery hurts SO bad. I know I needed it, but OUCHIE. It's important to take all of the drugs.
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[User Picture]From: qryb
2008-07-09 05:12 pm (UTC)
i have sympathy pain for you!!!

but operation pee straight is worth the battle! :-D
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[User Picture]From: gfrancie
2008-07-09 03:11 pm (UTC)
Time to watch English/Irish films about little towns doing big things or something.
"Waking Ned Devine" (old people fleecing the state lottery)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 03:19 pm (UTC)
Ooooh! I've never seen that. I shall get that into my netflix stash!
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[User Picture]From: gfrancie
2008-07-09 04:02 pm (UTC)
You might also want to add "Big Train" which is a British sketch comedy show. It is kind of grand because it ventures into the absurd without being too avant-garde.
You can watch one of their sketches here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0sEHFeFsdE
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 06:24 pm (UTC)
Hahaha that was funny! I hope she gets it so I can come watch it with her.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 06:27 pm (UTC)
Are you planning to come over tonight? Maybe we can do sushi in Federal Way? That way we don't have to worry about food.
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 08:41 pm (UTC)
If you want me I'm there. I already told Lan that I'll be going to your place tonight, so he's prepared.

On another topic, I LOVE LOVE LOVE the fact that my husband isn't working at night anymore (in case you didn't know, Sunday was his last night at pizza!!!) He is getting more work from his landscaping boss, plus working on a house for his cousin, plus doing work for you, and he may be doing some stuff for Lorrie soon. So we're not too broke.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 09:19 pm (UTC)
Can you come over? I can't drive, and I don't have a ride, but I'd love to see you.
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 09:52 pm (UTC)
I'll head over as soon as I'm off work. Expect me there around 6:15. If you can find a place for a manicure that late I'll take you, then I'll drive you to sushi. I don't expect you to be able to drive or to have rides, so until you're healed, assume any time I say anything relating to getting together that I plan on doing the driving.
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[User Picture]From: pollyhyper
2008-07-09 03:54 pm (UTC)
One of my favorite films EVER!!!
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[User Picture]From: teddyeddy
2008-07-09 03:13 pm (UTC)
How is Craig feeling? any better?

I am a terrible nurse, Mike is great at it, he just dances around me with fluffy bunnies and unicorns when I have been ill..I on the other hand really have very little patience for it...not that I dont love him, I just suck at it.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 03:20 pm (UTC)
Craig is having trouble getting his new medical card because of the new job and he REALLY needs the CT scan. He may have kidney stones and is sure acting like it. I'm worried.

Angela is amazing at it and she came to visit yesterday, so that was super helpful. :)
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[User Picture]From: teddyeddy
2008-07-10 02:58 am (UTC)
It is very good to have nurturing people in your life. I will say the same thing everyone else is saying.. feel better soon. Nothing worse then both people in the house sick or feeling poorly at the same time.
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[User Picture]From: pollyhyper
2008-07-09 04:01 pm (UTC)
Bridget Jones
A Fish Called Wanda
Anything Monty Python
The Princess Bride
Shaun of the Dead (assuming you can handle grossness)
This is Spinal Tap/Best In Show/A Mighty Wind
Danny Deckchair
Arthur
Meet The Parents
Raising Arizona
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Dodgeball
Some Like It Hot
Bringing Up Baby
Kung Fu Hustle

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[User Picture]From: theda
2008-07-09 05:12 pm (UTC)

Some varied movie recs

very silly:
Earth Girls Are Easy
Soapdish
Crank
The Ladies Man
Mystery Men
Joe Dirt

Fun kids movies:
Anything muppet
Annie
Adventures in Babysitting
The journey of Natty Gann
Don't tell mom the babysitters dead
Drop Dead Fred
The Monster Squad

Just plain ole comedies
A Fish Called Wanda
The Freshman
The Ref
Real Genius
Galaxy Quest


Classics:
The Philadelphia Story
Some Like it hot
The Apartment
A New Kind of Love
The Thin Man


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[User Picture]From: christabel
2008-07-09 06:12 pm (UTC)
SHREK!!!! ;) It's one of my all time happy making movies.

Other movies that make me laugh a lot in no particular order of importance:

The Bad News Bears (70's version is great but the remake with Billy Bob Thornton is classic too)

Bad Santa (So wrong and so damn good)

Blazing Saddles (intentionally as politically incorrect as it gets and my favorite anti-Seattle sentiment movie)

Galaxy Quest

Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Adventures in Babysitting

Ruthless People (One of my all time favorite Bette Midler movies- funny as hell)

Death to Smoochy (Robin Williams is so evil in this)

Mrs. Doubtfire

Splash (Young cute Tom Hanks and a mermaid!)

Revenge of the Nerds

The original Police Academy (Kim Cattrall many years pre- Samantha)

The Princess Bride

Labyrinth (David Bowie and great music need I say more?)

Practical Magic (Because sisters are important and beautiful scenery from Friday Harbor)

Wedding Crashers

Dirty Dancing ('Cause nobody puts Baby in the corner!)

Encino Man (Brendan Frasier doesn't even have to talk to be hot)

Lucas (probably one of my all time favorite 80's movies. Charlie Sheen was HOT, Corey Haim and Winona Ryder were adorably dorky)

Something About Mary (Cameron Diaz is so cute in this)

Sweet Home Alabama (I love Reese Witherspoon in this)

Top Gun (Tom Cruise when he was still hot and not a crazy scientologist)

Twins (Danny DeVito and Ahhh-nold as unlikely twin brothers)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Kristy Swanson and Luke Perry in the original movie)

I could on forever... but there are a few ideas. :)
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[User Picture]From: ashiegrrrl
2008-07-09 07:27 pm (UTC)
I think I love you. Awesome movie ideas!!
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[User Picture]From: christabel
2008-07-09 07:58 pm (UTC)
Well thank you. :) It is good to be loved. ;)
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[User Picture]From: anomalous_girl
2008-07-09 11:26 pm (UTC)
Totally agree on several of these, I forgot them in my list!!!
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 06:35 pm (UTC)
I agree that some of the comments were harsh and not very understanding. It seems to me that either there are the "sick pants" telling your how right and wonderful you are (and sometimes they're right) or the people that want to "set you straight". Like Jack Nicholson "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!!" hehehe.

I think that during this time of healing you will not be in a very good position to be looking into making changes in your perceptions. People that think you're looking at things the wrong way should just keep it to themselves for at least a couple of months so that your efforts aren't divided by the healing you NEED to do. I realize that people are well intentioned, but no one knows what you've been through except for you. And yeah, things are tough all over, but no one's pain effects you more than your own. And going through periods of pain is nothing like having chronic pain. Periods of lots and lots of pain, even if they're months long, aren't accompanied by the hopeless and helpless feelings that chronic pain is.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-09 06:39 pm (UTC)
I've told this to Craig, and now I'm telling it to you cause I love you.

This is the single hardest challenge I've faced. 2008 so far has been PAIN PAIN and more PAIN. But never count me out. I am a stock that is on the rise. I will fight my ass off and I'll make it through. However, I'm struggling really hard right now. I would not wish being around me on the people I love, so if it is too hard to witness, please take a break and trust that I'm working on it with everything I have.

I respect all of the opinions I got. I know they were all well intended even if I can't accept them all as intended this very second. I'm lucky to have strong support, like a sister I love who knows me like none other.

Since I got the necklace Gram bought me in Mexico stolen I've never had a jewelry give me strength. Every bad pain day I'm wearing the bracelet you brought me back and the necklace that sparkles from Amy.
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[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2008-07-09 09:45 pm (UTC)
I know so far this year has been hard on you. And you're right, sometimes it's hard to see you in so much pain so much of the time. But more importantly, it's inspiring to know that you're hurting but you're not letting that keep you from living your life. I think if I was feeling anything like you are right now I'd still be in bed and would only be seeing family. Even in your drugged out pain filled state, you still remembered to ask if we (Lan or I) wanted a beverage when we came to visit. You might not remember that, but I do.

I realize that you feel like you've lost 2 months of your life, and compared to how you normally live, you have. But you've lived the last 10 years so much more than so many others would have in your situation, and that is amazing! It's all because of your own gumption. And because you're such a hard worker.

Even when you're a grouchy, whiny, snivelling baby pee-pants, I still love you and always want to be around you. I'm so happy that you like the bracelet and it touches me that it's helpful to you. I love you! *hugs*
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[User Picture]From: teddyeddy
2008-07-10 03:00 am (UTC)
I agree
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[User Picture]From: puppie
2008-07-09 11:14 pm (UTC)
I don't think anybody else on earth has seen this, but it cracks me up -- My Fellow Americans.

Kids in the Hall is also out on DVD. Wonderful sick/tired viewing.
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[User Picture]From: anomalous_girl
2008-07-09 11:23 pm (UTC)
I freakin' LOVE that movie, I own it too, it is so damn funny.
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[User Picture]From: anomalous_girl
2008-07-09 11:23 pm (UTC)
Movie Recommendations:
When Harry Met Sally
Cutting Edge
Fools Rush In
Any and all seasons of Friends
Stuck on You
Knocked Up
Fried Green Tomatoes
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[User Picture]From: dkstwin
2008-07-10 04:36 am (UTC)
The only movies I would add to the list are.

Ice Age (I especially love the short with Scrat falling with his acorns and the waltz music playing, I laughed until I cried and was wiping tears off my chin)

Lilo and Stitch (so much to love about this one, like Stitch making the city and playing giant monster and destroying it and Lilo just calmly saying "No more caffeine for you.")
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-07-10 07:25 pm (UTC)
Yay! I OWN Lilo and Stitch. Will watch it tonight. :)
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[User Picture]From: crazyredhead888
2008-07-11 12:56 am (UTC)
I hope my comments were not too harsh. I was very irritated with my husband and sort of vented. Most of what I said applied much more to him of course since I have never met Craig and from what I've read he's generally wonderful.
I just happened on your post on a night where I was totally down on men and fairly hormonal. Sorry if I seemed too judgemental, I definitely did not mean to be.
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