Good advice. Most of which, I already follow. Including setting what I'm looking for, age range, etc.
Most men are still assholes, though. :p
They can be, but there are some good ones out there too. It helped me to look at dating as a hilarious way to get good blog material. If you see it as a fun experience you can tolerate more of it until you find that person you want to be with.
Women can be real assholes too.
Agreed, especially with numbers 1, 8, 10, and 15!!
I think the reason why I've done well in internet dating is really due to number 1. I haven't tried to hide my size at any size. You have to be honest with yourself and others or it isn't fair.
word. All of this is trufax.
I'd add that talking about prior dates/boyfriends or revealing a tendency to think that all men are bad people will automatically make you unattractive, especially in the first few dates.
Very true. You have to hold out faith that just like you aren't a money grubbing heart breaker, not all guys are shallow jerks just wanting booty. There are good people out there still for sure.
lol I am soooo glad I got married before people started looking for love online.
I did internet dating back in 1993. Srsly. I'm old.
Rob and I kind of found each other by accident through lj. We are both in a community for people from our college, and one day somebody posted complaining about being single, I replied, and so did he. That night he imed me. At first I wasn't really willing to give him a chance because he was too old for me (I was 19, he was 30 at the time). So we talked as friends, and a few weeks later I came to realize he was amazing, and there was potentially something there.
So I guess I disagree a little bit. Or maybe I just got lucky. It's been 3 and a half years, and I never knew I could love or be loved as much as I am.
All rules are made to be broken. :) I think it's good to date outside your "type".
This was a great post....I may have to post it on my board by desk as a reminder when I read replies from the dating sites.
Ha! Glad you had fun with it. :) I used to collect awesome mullet photos from guys when I did online dating. Once a guy with a mullet AND a handlebar moustache sent me a pic. I was rolling.
Yeah. *sigh* it's hard, though, to put that full length pic up there. I should really do that, though. Soon.
It's hard, but way easier than the disappointment of someone thinking you look different than you do.
Be proud of who you are. Not everyone will like it, but then again, you aren't looking for just anyone. We all exist in a human body if we want to think about it or not. Even if we HATE to think about it, we are partly defined by our body, especially in matters of romance.
I'd love to help people set up profiles. I"m good at taking photos. I like to hook people up if I can. I'm a romantic. I believe in twwoooo wuv.
I'd like to add... don't count a guy out for being younger than you. Not all young guys are immature.
My hubby's 8 years younger than I. When we met he was 21 and I was 29. I nearly didn't accept his offer for "free beer and red meat" but decided, I like beer and red meat! Imagine my shock when he opened doors and was SUPER polite!
He still does too. :)
Cute! Yes, it's always good to consider someone you might not usually date. The way you usually date may not be working, thus why you are single. :)
2008-06-17 01:42 am (UTC)
You hit it on the head....
I love this advice. I agree with all of this...maybe not the balding part(I hope you don't mind a little self promotion for any single girls out there!)
Advertise away! :)
Not the balding part? I didn't say ONLY balding, I'm just saying my experience is, you don't want to exclude these guys. Some of them are awesome. Same thing for guys who aren't quite as tall.
I'm not gonna flame you, but I will say that if I wasn't somewhat aggressive with my dentar
we wouldn't ever have gotten together, much less be engaged. He was very flirty with me when we met, but too shy to follow up on it, even with encouragement. I contacted him first, I kissed him first, and second, for that matter, was the seducer the first time we were together, and so on. I'm not big pushy about any of it or anything, and I certainly wouldn't have stalked him if he wasn't interested. But he's said many times he's so glad I did do what I did, because he just didn't think someone so pretty and smart (his words, not mine) would really be interested.
One of the best things, ever? I've seen his self confidence grow in leaps and bounds. I hope that it's grown enough that if something happens to me he won't be too shy to find someone else.
Oh, and he's been an absolutely awesome bf/fiance. No man has ever treated me better.
I think this is good advise except for #15
. The first time Lan kissed me I WAS NOT impressed. It was just several hard fast pecks. Once he relaxed a bit, he became a much better kisser. And now, I love to kiss him. Sometimes people are just uptight the first time they kiss you. If that's the only drawback, they should be given another chance and if one is brave enough, tell them what they're doing wrong.
Was that the ENTIRE first date he kissed you though, or just the first kiss?
2008-06-21 07:58 pm (UTC)
okcupid.com is good AND free.
I found it was good at getting really ugly polyamory dudes to contact me as well as a bunch of gaming dorks. I think it depends what you're looking for. ;)
I did get an awesome collection of ugly mullet and goatee photos that people sent me from that site.