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Part 3-The longest list in history - Redhead Rantings [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Lanette

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Part 3-The longest list in history [Jan. 28th, 2008|09:11 pm]
Lanette
[Current Mood |amusedamused]


51. When you burn the roof of your mouth.
52. People who say, "Everything happens for a reason." What about you? Is your reason to annoy me?
53. When people stop right in the middle of a walkway oblivious to the world around them.
54. People who almost STOP on the freeway before they exit. It's called an offramp.
55. When you get a bra you think fits, then once you move around a little, suddenly you are sporting the Quad Boob look.
56. When you have a shirt that looks good, and as soon as you sit down half of your boobs are out in public.
57. When you go to the bathroom and discover that somehow you've tucked your skirt into your tights, or static cling has caused a major fashion emergency.
58. Static cling in general, especially since both of my cats have it.
59. Cleaning the gross mess of cat fur off of my couch and finding it has shed claws and litter in it, along with cat drool.
60. When my eyes turn red due to pain and people assume either I'm high or have been crying.
61. People who show up uninvited or invite people to my house who I didn't invite and/or don't know. I'm very protective about my home and if I don't know and trust you, likely you can't come over even with references.
62. People who call in sick for no reason. I go to work feeling like crap warmed over almost every day. I don't understand it if you call in sick and really aren't. I should get your sick day.
63. The way they size women's clothing. It's insane!
64. People who bring carry-on luggage on flights and crowd to the front when they aren't supposed to be boarding so theirs gets in first.
65. When you are walking and someone gets so close to you that your natural arm swing hits them. Don't invade my personal space for no reason.
66. When you get a lipstick that is a pretty color, but tastes disgusting.
67. That awkward moment when you go out to eat with friends and aren't sure what the heck is going on with the bill.
68. When people have so many face fillers that it looks like their whole face is flat and they smile like the Joker.
69. Women who tan so much that they have leathery looking chests and necks.
70. When they say on meat products "Fed an all vegetarian diet". WTF? It's MEAT. Obviously I'm not a vegetarian, so why is it a big deal if the dead animals I'm eating are? If I cared enough, would I even be eating meat? Well, it's sure a good thing those beasts I'm devouring are vegan, cause h*ll if I'm gonna eat that way.
71. People who think it is ok to be irresponsible because their friends and family will pick up the pieces. They deserve to be dropped on their butt. Tough love.
72. Stevia. It's the worst tasting sweetener ever. Don't believe the hype. Eww gross.
73. Plus-sized women in hot pants. Now, I love me some big girls. Women of ALL Sizes can be sexy, but for the love of God, not in those! I suppose that applies to plus-sized men as well. Actually, any men.
74. The song, "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie is among the most annoying songs ever. If she does a duet with Soldyah Boi (or whatever stupid way he spells it), my head could explode.
75. People who smoke in their car and drop the smoldering stench on the ground while at a stoplight. It sucks and is littering at ANY point, but at a stoplight I have to smell it too. I just laugh at them and imagine the pre-mature aging as a cackle in my car plotting revenge via fart projection into their car.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: anunnakigirl
2008-01-29 05:33 am (UTC)
As much as I know my friends and family meant well and they love me, I did get tired of hearing #52 when I lost my job. Almost everyone I know said it.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-29 05:35 am (UTC)
It's the classic when you don't know what to say.

Sometimes "that sucks and I feel bad for you" is better.
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[User Picture]From: gfrancie
2008-01-29 05:37 am (UTC)
When they say on meat products "Fed an all vegetarian diet".

That is labeled because of the mad-cow scares. Those cows were fed food that had cow-bits in them. Usually people who feed their farm animals sub-standard food are more likely to play loose and dangerous in other areas -thus resulting in more potentially dangerous food in the super market.
Of course I could go on a whole diatribe about the FDA. But the vegetarian diet thing is kind of important. Animals that accidentally become cannibals often end up sick. I could tell you a story about some chickens that got hooked on eating chicken meat. It was scary.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-29 05:49 am (UTC)
We could try feeding them an all fish diet, then we'd have mad mercury man.
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[User Picture]From: thesugarmonster
2008-01-29 09:59 am (UTC)
55. When you get a bra you think fits, then once you move around a little, suddenly you are sporting the Quad Boob look.

I always refer to it as “Double Bubble.” And it annoys the hell out of me.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-29 03:37 pm (UTC)
Just as soon as you try to adjust it, someone walks around the corner (at work). Argh.
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[User Picture]From: specsafety
2008-01-29 01:29 pm (UTC)

Hilarious!!!

53,54,61, 70 and 72. I cannot tell you how stupid people are!! It just amazes me when I am out in public, and these idiots are in their own little world OBLIVIOUS to everyone around them! And people who just drop in!!! Forget it. It drives me insane. I actually had one neighbor who would walk into my house. I am like, WTF! I could be entertaining one of my female friends, half nakid in a chicken suit, goggles and fins(not really, I just wanted to share that visual)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-29 03:39 pm (UTC)

Re: Hilarious!!!

That is a crazy neighbor. Luckily our neighbors are yuppie, and one is sports oriented to the extreme (as in, more time spent dribbling a basketball than sleeping), but nice and non-invasive.

I think you need a chicken suit icon!
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[User Picture]From: pollyhyper
2008-01-29 03:22 pm (UTC)
60. When my eyes turn red due to pain and people assume either I'm high or have been crying.

I wear contact lenses and suffer from dry eye. My eyes are almost always bloodshot. People never fail to tell me how red they are, and I do get looks from strangers - "is she stoned?"
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-29 03:40 pm (UTC)
That bugs me. With pain, if you tell them, "I'm in really bad pain." They say, "Oh, you are taking too many pain killers! You must be high on them." They can't understand that actually my eyes are redder and I'm more impaired if I don't take enough to control the pain than if I take more and the pain is under control. It's a balance.
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[User Picture]From: verybadlady
2008-01-29 04:06 pm (UTC)
I'm with you on most of them, but especially #74. Holy crap I can't stand that song.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-30 11:50 am (UTC)
Yeah, I'd like to throw her a blanket party. Wrap her up in it and beat the daylights out of her.
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[User Picture]From: graphxgrrl
2008-01-29 05:15 pm (UTC)
I will take sick days when I'm not sick at least a few times a year--usually because when I'm actually sick we're usually too busy for me to stay at home.

I call them "mental health" days. ;)
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-30 11:51 am (UTC)
This is why we have "PTO" where sick days and vacation are one in my company. It works out well. I think everyone needs a day off every now and again.
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[User Picture]From: graphxgrrl
2008-01-30 03:23 pm (UTC)
I actually dislike PTO as a concept, it always felt like when I was sick, I was taking away from my vacation time.
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[User Picture]From: compassionate
2008-01-30 03:17 am (UTC)
I totally love your lists so far. I agree with so many points. #53 happens to be all the time and it makes me want to scream.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-30 11:51 am (UTC)
Thanks. Ranting is a hobby. :)
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[User Picture]From: dove
2008-01-30 06:23 am (UTC)
Aaahahahahaha! These are fun to read.
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[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2008-01-30 11:52 am (UTC)
My goal is to have the list reach 500 one day. If I can rant about 500 minor things that annoy me and still have only first world problems on it, that means I have a pretty problem free life.
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[User Picture]From: dove
2008-01-30 03:01 pm (UTC)
Well, you don't have a problem free life. But I don't even know if I could come up with 50. Ahh, a challenge now! I have homework to do!
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