?

Log in

No account? Create an account
Brain=not exciting or special but possibly tasty on toast - Redhead Rantings [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Lanette

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Brain=not exciting or special but possibly tasty on toast [Aug. 22nd, 2007|07:42 pm]
Lanette
[Current Mood |Dumb]

Many times I post a photo and get tons of comments, but I sent out my new testing blog to everyone I know for feedback and only one person (mad thanks to xantha) said a peep about it. It sits in confinement waiting to be torn apart and rebuilt better, faster, stronger, and it has nary a comment to warm it. I'm hoping that people are going to take time later in the week and read it. Today was a busy day and I think at least my co-workers will give me something on it. I mean, at this point I'd even welcome someone telling me "that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard."

I'm feeling dumb or possibly facing the fact that I'm a person of average brain power. I just have above average motivation and energy. I feel that my ideas aren't that smart and maybe sharing them is pointless. I was so excited about sharing this idea, and guess what? Nobody cares what is in my brain. People don't read. They would rather see a funny video or another lolcat.

Besides, I've talked to people who are really amazingly smart. I'm amazingly fast, amazingly caring, and amazingly hard working and dedicated. I'm not amazingly smart. I read more and research more than most people. I feed my brain more. But the raw talent? It just isn't there for me. I can't ever reach the high level of some of the people I interact with because I'm starting with less. Not with too little, just with less than exceptional, and it is disappointing. All through school I thought I was smart and I always did well, but on a larger scale, even for my local city, I don't rank anywhere in the list of the smartest women. Being even considered "smart" is really difficult because we have so many great thinkers. Imagine how low I would be on a national or even global scale. Now I feel like smart should be my side hobby, like I'm a desperate 22 year old overweight gymnast still thinking that somehow with extra effort I'll be a famous Olympian. Give it up, it's just not in the cards. At some point you are missing out on goals you could be reaching if you chase and unrealistic dream to the extreme. Why do I care so much if I'm smart? I mean, I'm nice. I'm not ugly. I'm a good friend. Why is smart so important? Just because my mind isn't exceptional doesn't mean that I don't contribute in some way to the world.

Now that I've bummed myself out, I'm going to go watch Jerry Springer to remind myself how low the bar is set at the bottom of the intellect curve. That will make me feel better, or wait, I can just go to the local Walmart or read anything about Paris Hilton. I think part of my inferiority is that I'm around too many smart people and I forget just how many mouth breathers are walking the streets of every city in the world as I type here.

Remember when I said I'd be willing to lose IQ for extra sex appeal? I don't feel that way now. Beauty is fleeting, but stupid is forever. As my mother says, don't sell your brain!
LinkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: alitria
2007-08-23 03:15 am (UTC)
I suppose this could be true, I don't know you that well. However, I think that the idea of having a testing blog is cool, but I'm so far out of the tech loop at this point in my career, I feel like I have nothing useful to say.

It's weird I used to feel a lot smarter than I do now, and I'm not sure what happened. I think that when you get to a point of having specialized knowledge, it can make you feel dumber. I mean, brainpower I used to devote to reading classics is now devoted to understanding special education law or culturally appropriate suicide prevention strategies. Sure, it's important but it's not really the same.

Feh, I'm just babbling but I don't think there's anything wrong with your brain, I just think our culture has an incredibly limited definition of "smart" and living here has made me think about that way more. Also the smarter people are, the more harshly they seem to judge themselves.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 03:22 pm (UTC)
I started my testing blog after going to a testing conference and taking a seminar from James Bach, who I really respect. I'm glad I have the blog, although I'm not sure how to get more feedback on my test ideas. I'm just realizing that some people just "do their job" in testing and I'm weird because I really really love testing and geek out about it. It's tough to realize that other people are smarter than I am, and better at testing. I am good, and want to improve. Having extra passion doesn't make me the smartest, and that kind of sucks.

I think I just need to keep reading other blogs and find people who inspire me, and just write about testing when I want to. Even if it doesn't get read, it helps me to write it out, so it still serves a purpose.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: boringgirl
2007-08-23 03:55 am (UTC)
you also can't really "fix" stupid..... but you can get a nose or boob job!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 03:23 pm (UTC)
Ha! Just don't get a nose added to the boobs, and it's all good.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: random_girl
2007-08-23 05:28 am (UTC)
I did read it, but got side swiped by the fall out of the notice I had to give someone today and then the fact that my boss's boss (one of my good friends) was "up in my grill" about issues with the client today. My natural reaction to dissapointing friends is PANIC. So I've been a bit distracted (although he and I are sorted out).

I like the idea of a Bug Harvest. I also think there are times when siccing (sp?) the entire test team, for a limited period, on an item is a good idea, too. We called those Bug Bashes. Rather than enter the bugs directly into the db, it was all funnelled through the tester coordinating the run, who gave general instructions ("We're testing this functionality, please go crazy, this is how you get to it"), and then followed up on all issues. It made the Program Managers happy, because they could participate (felt like they were doing something!) and it gave a window of real users pounding the thing (during which you could also set up stress testing to see if the user experience sucked rocks).

Bug Harvest is much more targeted; picking the right people to get the most out of the limited time. Professionals who are familiar with the area, and, in cases where it touches on places that aren't complete, are in the know about what a bug is and isn't.

I also like the idea of a Bug Harvest for the expertise of the testers who are working it. When I did bashes, I didnt' get a lot of data from the testers about what they did, but in a Harvest its a smaller set--you can ask people to give you a general "here's where I messed about and here is where the trouble areas are" report, which can result in future test cases to find future bugs, even if they weren't present during the Harvest.

Those tests (plus the tests to prove the bugs they find during the Harvest are eventually fixed) could be an excellent source of additional insight to people running automated tests or black box testers who have been over the same territory a zillion times and need some out-of-the-box thinking.

On the whole, it's a cool idea. I'm sorry I didn't get to respond earlier.

(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 03:33 pm (UTC)

It sounds like you had a rough few days this week.

My team was quite busy as our quarter ends in not so many days and it's crazy how ambitious our goals were this quarter.

I think bug bashes and "hunts" are very useful too, but they work better when the feature is a bit more mature than right at handoff time or after major new changes because they don't require the instant communication, so in a way they scale much better. I've tried a bug harvest of 9 people, and that was too many, where in a bug hunt it wouldn't be.

I'm going to blog about my roadmap idea and the "treetop" regression strategy in a few days. I think in combining the two ideas before with harvests, it was too confusing, when really, they are different ideas that can be used together.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: ashiegrrrl
2007-08-23 06:56 am (UTC)
I don't think I remember you mentioning a testing blog before. Sorry I missed it, it sounds like a cool idea! I know absolutely nothing about what you do, though.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 03:34 pm (UTC)
My blog is about software testing, so really, it's about software quality and how to raise it in my opinion more than anything.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: specsafety
2007-08-23 12:25 pm (UTC)

I know exactly what you are going through....

When the weight started coming off, my mind cleared. I with the clarity, I felt I could do anything...so at a ripe old age, I went back to school to pursue a law degree. I have to admit I was humbled by the kids, half my age, as bright and articulate as you would ever want to be! My thoughts lately have been so vivid...I am back inventing again(can't help it, engineering nerd) Additionally, I am kicking ass at work and they keep promoting me. I think you have been going though the same metamorphasis and most likely eating perfectly. I am a firm believer, now more than ever, that the food choices we make, affect not only our weight and overall health, but our mind as well. I like to eat foods as close to the original as possible--and obviously no refined flour and sugar.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 03:39 pm (UTC)

Re: I know exactly what you are going through....

I really feel more like myself than I ever have in life, like I've been stripped to the core and am no longer in a haze. It's made me have new goals and dreams and I feel like I can reach them all. The truth is, NO, I can't do everything. I wouldn't say I'm eating perfectly, but I would say I eat more healthy food with a focus on protein than I ever have in my entire life. I'm also never eating large portions. Most of the carbs that I do eat are potatos, corn, grains, so more of a S. beach type food than I used to eat. One thing that I know I could improve is my serious crutch, Diet Coke. It's so hard for me to stop ingesting it, and I've read the research. It's putting a bunch of chemicals into my body and I know my reliance on it isn't on the up and up. I mean, not that I think diet soda is evil in general, but my use of it has momentum, you know what I mean? I just have to remind myself how much progress I've made and like anything else, it's just keep trying in the right direction and you get there. I'm practicing making better choices, that doesn't mean I'm perfect at it.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 04:21 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I worry that it might be too analogy heavy to really make sense to scientific type minds.

There are no really unique ideas, but this is one half of my idea which made it to phase 2 for our patent program. Of course, it's non-defensible and much of it is common sense and practical applied knowledge. I think it is a good testing method in some situations and I like using it. If even one other tester tries it and finds it useful, it will have been worth writing out and sharing the idea.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: kanderson321
2007-08-23 04:42 pm (UTC)

I'm not a QA person, but my hubby is

I'm going to ask Will to poke his head in and give you some feedback -- he's been in the testing industry for most (if not all) of his professional career.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 07:58 pm (UTC)

Re: I'm not a QA person, but my hubby is

Thanks!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: kanderson321
2007-08-23 09:45 pm (UTC)

Re: I'm not a QA person, but my hubby is

He posted some feedback for you; I will warn you though, he has a bad back and is on vicodin right now. I'm not going to vouch for his lucidity! :)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: puppie
2007-08-23 04:45 pm (UTC)
I would have read it except I have no idea what anybody above is talking about (except the commenter who was talking about your brain clearing when you eat better -- I understood that one LOL).

But if you make a blog that doesn't go right over my head, I would TOTALLY read it and give feedback. :-)
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 07:59 pm (UTC)
I was more talking about the tech people who read my blog and my co-workers who DO know the area that I sent it out to.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: vivaine666
2007-08-23 06:55 pm (UTC)
OF COURSE you get way more comments on pictures than you do on a tech blog. The photo is instant and requires only a fraction of a second to analyze and a few words to communicate your opinion. With the testing blog you have to take the time to read it, wrap your brain around what it's trying to tell you, analyze it, then put together some intelligent thoughts (not required when looking at a picture) for your response. Only a fraction of your readers are testers and therefore want to take the time to do that for an area that they're not good at and, frankly, don't really care about. It's not really fair for you to take offense at, or blame yourself for, other people's lack of interest in the same thing you're interested in. Also, you must remember that, for the most part, truly extrordinary people aren't recognized as such until years, sometimes decades or centuries, after their death.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 08:00 pm (UTC)
Yeah, well I wasn't talking about the people who read my LJ usually, but the people who do testing that I sent it out to. I think they are just busy, but I'm so excited about the idea that I can't help but take it somewhat personally.

I find things online, even blogs, written a long time ago and still find them inspiring and useful, so maybe in the future someone will find it and like it.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dove
2007-08-23 07:49 pm (UTC)
First of all, the only dumb thing about you is thinking that you could possibly have an average or below average level of "smarts".

Secondly, I don't have even the foggiest clue WHAT to do with any topic related to testing in any way, so I haven't checked it out because it might as well be in binary for all I'd be able to get out of it.

(Plus, I'm almost always reading this from work which is a major no-no so I try to get in and out of lj quickly these days.)
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: starrynytes4me
2007-08-23 08:01 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I just had so hoped for feedback from other people who are into testing, and am bummed about that lack of interest. Makes me feel doubtful.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dove
2007-08-23 08:19 pm (UTC)
Think of it this way - your idea is safe! hehe
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: xantha
2007-08-24 02:28 pm (UTC)
I subscribed to the testing blog in my rss aggregator (bloglines) -- I'll point it out to a couple of dev/qa friends of mine when I get the chance. :) I like reading techie blogs. I do a lot more dev work these days but I started out in QA/test, so I have that background (which really makes a difference in how I write code).

:)
(Reply) (Thread)